*GASP* Did I just type that? Now before the holy rollers start praising Jesus, just slow your roll and back the Jesus train up a bit. Now, I say church but, I do not mean church in the context the average American thinks of church. There isn't any praying... well, there’s probably some somewhere in the building but I'm not part of it.  No one is laying on hands unless there is a hug involved and the one time hell was mentioned the laughter it caused warmed my dark evil godless tree-hugging heart. So I wouldn't call it church.
I prefer the term fellowship, not just because it’s the name on the building but, it more accurately describes what happens there. Of course the bigger question is why I of all people would go to a * looks around...whispers...* church? My last encounter with a church was in 2008 and it was a favor to my father because they were having a family and friends day and we just happened to be in town on that very Sunday. Talk about a miscalculation in my vacation planning! Since then I've done my best to avoid religious institutions and religion in general-aside from debates and general rage induced rants-.
If I generally don't like religion why would I crawl out of bed on a perfectly good Sunday morning? The Spouse and I pretty much agree that religion is generally a waste of time but, when it comes to Unitarian Universalism he and I differ. I find UUism...interesting, yeah I think that's the best word to use. You never really know what you'll get. Before I walk into any relatives church I can tell you exactly what will happen, moment for moment-based on the flavor of Christianity they prescribe to- and when it's all said and done I'll still be going to hell in their eyes.
But when I walk into a UU fellowship I'm allowed to confront nearly 30 years of religious bullshit that would take years to wade through and this blog is not the place for it all, and I can do it in a community of love and understanding.  Which gets to the why of it all. Over my life I've heard and seen things that have made me cynical, unyielding, and at times downright cruel to those who believe a whole host of things that I just don't see any shred of evidence for-and to the human race in general-. 
Now, granted at times this has been justified, I see no point in playing nice with someone who equates gays with pedophiles or who claims that Atheist and other non members of the "right" religion are the cause of all the world's problems. But, I can't lump people who carry one label in with all the idiots who also carry that label. It's not fair to project my baggage on individuals who are good decent people. This I know, that doesn't mean it's easy to do. In fact, far from it, while I work through my own personal issues with the religious community though, I still have three little people who are looking to me for answers.
I have no issues with sharing my personal beliefs with them -they are my children after all-, and have done so and will continue to do so. I know, though, that my own personal beliefs about every single issue are just that, my own. I can't very well criticize religious parents for not giving their children the option to find their own beliefs and then prevent my children from doing the same. It's hypocritical and truthfully for me it seems unfair.  The one thing I hated more than anything on Sunday mornings growing up was the fact that I wasn't given a choice. I had to go to church, I had to believe that what I was told was the only truth, and I better smile while I praised the sweet baby Jesus for all he does! I've never wanted that for my children. 
Every Sunday they are given a choice and they go if they so choose, they learn in an environment where they are free to question, and where they can talk with other people from various backgrounds and start to think deeper about what they've been taught at home or heard from family members. They have the freedom of choice. And while they're exploring their beliefs they're also reaffirming values we teach in our home, and who doesn't love an outlet that tells your kids to just be a decent loving human being simply because we only have this one planet and we all have to live on it together? No threats of eternal hell fire, not gods and goddesses to please.
Just people working together to make the world a bit better. I can get out of bed for that.

Copyright(c)2013 Rayven Holmes


  1. LOVE your post! We stopped going to church a long time ago. After we sat in the pews and listened to a so called minister tell us that your place in heaven depended on your spouses rank bahhh.. Yes, it was on a military base.

    These past few years I have seem SO many people who call themselves Christians do nothing but tear those around them down. Somehow I missed the lesson in Sunday school that taught people to be so damn judgmental. More and more I find myself questioning ALL forms of religion!

  1. I have found the UUs to be VERY freeing! And, in St. Louis, we have the Ethical Society...even BETTER!!!!

    Great post!

  1. As one of the ones you *didn't* project your baggage onto, who got to have dialog with you (NOT the debates lol), I think this is really awesome. Coming from those discussions to this. Not for one second did I think of you meaning one of "my" kind of churches (although you're always welcome, wink wink nudge nudge). I even have a bicycle you can borrow. heeheehee

    As for Sabrinat's comment about a chaplain saying our place in heaven is defined by our spouse's rank... OH MY. I am so sorry you were told that. That person should be ashamed of themselves. What a jack wagon. :( I assure you there are religious people in the military who absolutely do NOT subscribe to that craziness and I hope you get to hang out with some of them soon - not as a proselytizing thing, but just so you can get that nasty taste out of your mouth from such a cruddy comment even being made to y'all!

  1. I haven't been to church in about 4 years, but have considered joining a UU church... I like how they accept everyone... even the "non-religious". :)

Post a Comment

Share your thoughts, but be warned if you are here to be hateful no one will see your comments...unless I'm in a foul mood at which point I will let my minions loose on you. Muwhahahahaaa. ;)